Covered In Flour and Still Single
by llamaswithbowties
Summary: When Thad criticises Wes' idea of romance, Wes points out that Thad himself doesn't have a girlfriend. However, this leads to Wes' attempt at matchmaking. One shot related The 7 Step Plan To Getting Your Two Gay Friends Together: the time mentioned a lot that Thad ended up covered in flour and still single. You don't have to have read that fic to read this.


_**[A/N] So, this is a one shot about the time that is mentioned on various occasions in The 7 Step Plan To Getting Your Two Oblivious Gay Friends Together. You don't have to have read that fic to read this though. I just thought y'all who had read it might want to know what actually happened. So, here it is. Enjoy! And if you haven't read T7SPTGYTOGFT (even abbreviated, it's long) then please do so! :)**_

* * *

"Maria is going to hate you for this," Thad said as he sat down on Wes' bed.

"What?" Wes said, genuinely confused. "Why is she going to hate me?"

"Because, my friend, it's Valentine's day next week and all you've got her is a card and a gift voucher for Pizza Hut," Thad pointed out.

"What? That way she knows where to take me next time she's paying for a date!" Wes reasoned.

"I honestly have no idea how you even got a girlfriend!"

"You're one to talk Thaddeus. I don't see you with a girlfriend!" Wes pointed out.

"I may not have a girlfriend, but I know how to treat a girl."

"Then why don't you put those skills to good use and get yourself a girl?"

"Wes, how many times have I told you? I don't want a girlfriend right now," said Thad, falling back to lie across the bed.

"A million times and I've not listened once. I know you have some crazy crush on Melissa. Why don't you get on her?" Wes asked.

"Melissa would never go out with me. She's waaaay out of my league," Thad argued.

"Naw, dude, she was all over you at the last formal with the Crawford girls."

"It helped that one of the girls had sneaked in a few rather large bottles of vodka."

"Exactly! When you're drunk you do things that you want to do but you're too scared to do when you're sober. I mean, remember that time when we had a party at David's and John admitted to Blaine that he'd always wondered what kissing a guy would be like and they ended up making out?" Wes reminded him.

"How could I forget? But they were, like, super smashed. Out of their head smashed. They probably didn't even know what they were doing."

"You're just proving my point. Anyway, I think that you should get Melissa to be your valentine. Us Warbler's will help. You could even serenade her!" Wes suggested.

"No, no, no. I am not serenading Melissa. That's ridiculous."

"Will you at least ask her out? I just know that she'll say yes! I'll even ask Maria to put in a good word. Go on, take a risk!" Wes encouraged. Thad thought for a moment. "If you don't, you'll spend Valentine's day stuck in the common rooms with Blaine texting Kurt. He'll even do that little face he does when he misses him. Y'know the one? He looks like someone's kicked his puppy?"

Thad shook his head at the idea and nodded. "Fine. Fine, I'll ask Melissa out. But if this goes wrong then I am never speaking to you ever again, Wesley Montgomary!"

"I highly doubt that. You love me," Wes argued. Thad stood up to leave, shaking his head in disapproval. "Don't you walk away from me Thaddeus! You know you love me!" Thad just grabbed his phone and left.

* * *

"Are you sure about this?" Thad asked as the Warblers gathered outside the shop at the mall.

"Dude, she works at a bakery. This is perfect. You couldn't possibly ignore this opportunity," Wes assured him.

"This better go well, Wes. Simply for your safety."

"Don't worry about it," Wes said with a wink, before turning to his fellow Warblers.

"Ready boys?" he called. He got a series of nods in reply and turned back to Thad with a grin, gesturing towards the entrance. "After you, my friend."

The Warblers walked into the bakery, lead by Thad. The shop wasn't very big, but it was enough to give the Warblers the space they needed to perform. A few customers were distributed around the room, sat at tables drinking tea and coffee and nibbling on cakes. At least there wouldn't be many people to witness if this went wrong. Thad noticed Melissa standing at a table and gathering cups and plates onto a tray, an apron hugging her waist.

Thad turned to Wes, who was standing near a table holding a travel mug. Thad then nodded, which signalled for Wes to bang on the table with the travel mug three times.

Thad took a breath as the patrons of the bakery all looked in their direction, and spoke loudly, _"Come in! Well, well, well, look who's here! I haven't seen you in many a year!"_

The Warblers sprang into action, bopping the familiar tune that they'd been practising for days as Thad began to sing.

_If I knew you were comin' I'd've baked a cake_  
_baked a cake, baked a cake_  
_If I knew you were comin' I'd've baked a cake_

Thad paused as the Warblers all sang.

_Howd-ya do, howd-ya do, howd-ya do_

He looked over at Melissa as he continued to sing. She looked surprised at his appearance and performance, but he wasn't yet sure whether it was a good thing or a bad thing.

_Had you dropped me a letter, I'd a-hired a band_  
_Grandest band in the land_  
_Had you dropped me a letter, I'd a-hired a band_  
_And spread the welcome mat for you_

By this time, the other employees of the bakery had come from the kitchen to see what was going on. Around the till they stood, watching the performance, but Thad attempted to ignore them.

_Oh, I don't know where you came from_  
_'cause I don't know where you've been_  
_But it really doesn't matter_  
_Grab a chair and fill your platter_  
_And dig, dig, dig right in_

Thad looked over at Wes, who shot him an encouraging grin and nodded his head in Melissa's direction. Thad turned his attention back to her.

_If I knew you were comin' I'd've baked a cake_  
_baked a cake, baked a cake_  
_If I knew you were comin' I'd've baked a cake_  
_Howd-ya do, howd-ya do, howd-ya do_

Thad danced up to Melissa, who was had abandoned the tray she'd been using to collect up cups and plates to instead lean against the table she'd been clearing, arms folded neatly over her chest and her eyebrows raised. He ignored the urge he had to walk away and dance amongst the Warblers and instead performed directly to her.

_Had you dropped me a letter_  
_I'd a-hired a band_  
_Grandest band in the land_  
_Had you dropped me a letter_  
_I'd a-hired a band_  
_Spread the welcome mat for you_

_Oh, I don't know where you came from_  
_'Cause I don't know where you've been_  
_But it really doesn't matter_  
_Grab a chair and fill your platter_  
_And dig, dig, dig right in_

For the final chorus, Thad returned to Warblers, but continued to perform in Melissa's direction.

_If I knew you were comin' I'd've baked a cake_  
_Hired a band, goodness sake_  
_If I knew you were comin' I'd've baked a cake_  
_Howd-ya do, howd-ya do, howd-ya do_

_Howd-ya do, howd-ya do, howd-ya do_  
Howd-ya do-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

When the song finished, a round of applause sounded from the customers of the bakery and the majority of the staff. Thad smiled to himself. At least they'd liked it. Melissa clapped along, before taking the tray once more and walking up to the counter, making her way behind it so that she was by the till. The Warblers all went and took seats around the bakery and Wes came Thad a nudge with his elbow, nodding in Melissa's direction.

Thad took a deep breath before walking up to the counter, head held high and feigning confidence. Once there, he rested his hands on the counter in front of him and cleared his throat lightly to get Melissa's attention. She looked up with a smile on her face.

"I must say, Thad, you Warblers certainly are brilliant performers," Melissa commented.

"Thanks," Thad said, returning her smile.

"So, is there any particular reason that you decided to have an impromptu performance in the middle of my place of work?" she asked.

Thad tried to ignore her co-workers, who were gathered behind her and obviously eavesdropping. He swallowed and answered truthfully, "I was wondering if you would like to be my Valentine."

Melissa looked taken aback, her eyes growing wide and she glanced behind her for a second. "Oh. I can't say that I was, erm, expecting that," she said, nervously.

"So?" Thad prompted.

"Thad, I loved the performance and I know you're lovely but-" Before she could continue, Thad's vision went white. Literally.

Thad stood, mouth agape as flour fell from his hair into his eyes and onto his blazer, the dark colour contrasting against the white flour. He brought his hand up to wipe his eyes and looked up to see a man, who should have probably looked ridiculous considering the fact that he was wearing an apron but his rather large biceps made up for it, holding an empty bag of flour and looking absolutely furious.

He walked around the counter, turned Thad around and pulled him forward by the collar of his blazer. "Stay. Away. From. My. Girlfriend." he warned, narrowing his eyes slightly with every word. When he let go, Thad looked over to Melissa, who was just sending him an apologetic smile.

Thad groaned and turned to Wes, whose head was ducked in an attempt to avoid Thad's gaze. He stormed up to him, leaving a trail of flour behind and grabbed him by his blazer.

"You, Wesley Montgomary, are a dead man! You didn't even check to see if she had a boyfriend?" he yelled at Wes. Wes just shrugged with an apologetic smile.

Thad had learned his lesson; never take advice about girls from Wes.


End file.
